Thirteen Manners

What is of interest is that after the discussion of the Banū Isrāʾīl there are some thirteen Islamic adab, points of etiquette and akhlāq, which Muslims should adorn themselves with and take into themselves. Many of these are matters of collective adab; many are collective adab.

And what must be understood is that a nation only rises and raises itself and becomes honourable by the akhlāq it shows. Not by killing and murder — that does not reach the heart. But when a man acts with akhlāq, that is what truly matters. Look, then, at verses 23 to 39, and all of this discussion will be seen there. Verses 23 to 39.

So Allah (swt) says wa qaḍā rabbuka allā taʿbudū illā iyyāhu wa bi-l-wālidayni iḥsānā. This is the famous verse upon obedience to parents, speaking of how, when one's parents reach old age especially, one must not — and here the Qur'an uses an onomatopoeia, using a word to say: do not even say uff. Which plainly means that nothing worse may be said. But do not even say uff to your parents. You may disagree with them politely and respectfully, but you may not show any disobedience, nor any bad manners and disobedience. You must always show them that love, for the fact that they gave you birth. They brought you into the world. This again is an oft-discussed matter, and is not discussed again here.

The first of these akhlāq and adab and Islamic rites, then, is: worship none but Allah (swt). The second is obedience and kindness and excellence towards parents. The third — and these may be gone through quickly, and found in the verses — is being good to your relatives, and to the faqīr and the poor, and to the musāfirīn, the travellers, to look out for them. And then Allah (swt) says: do not be extravagant, do not waste money, and do not use your wealth in what is unlawful; for such people, who are extravagant in that way, are the brothers of the shayṭān. Because Allah has given them much, they use it in disobedience to Allah (swt).

Then Allah (swt) says: do not be miserly either, but spend where you must spend. Do not open your hand so wide that you spend everything and have nothing left and are then full of remorse; but neither be so tight.

Do not kill your children for fear of poverty. Then some of the major matters: verse 33, do not kill people — do not kill people unless there is a right to do so. Do not go near the wealth of the yatīm. Fulfil your covenants, and see that you give the right scale and measure — verse 35.

And another is: do not pursue things of which you have no knowledge and then set a great rumour going. Rumour-mongering, slander, tale-bearing, such things are to be avoided. For everything will be asked about, Allah says: your sight, your hearing and all of it.

And another is: do not swagger about the earth in arrogance. Do not go about as a braggart, exalting yourself and stamping upon the ground; for Allah says that you will not be able to tear the ground open. What is it that you are trying to do? You set yourself against the ground, and you cannot reach the mountains in height in any case. All of that is set out there.