The Wisdom of Not Being Alone Together

The fifth lesson to be drawn here is the wisdom behind the prohibition of a man and a woman being alone together — particularly one man with one woman, that kind of khalwah. It is always held to be a great fitnah, and not between the two of them alone; for the hadith in al-Tirmidhī mentions that when a man and a woman are alone together, the third among them will generally be Shayṭān. That is what people call the chemistry: there was chemistry between us, or electricity, or whatever one wishes to call it. That is what it is — there will always be this desire, such being the way Allah has made human beings, with attraction between men and women. So when they are alone and no one else is present, the thought arises: perhaps there is something we might do here. But Shayṭān is always there; it is Shayṭān who does the prompting.

And the experience of a number of people bears this out at work as well. There has been a suggestion from Wall Street of late, after the Me Too movement: do not be alone in a meeting. There are men of principle who are never alone with a member of the opposite sex, even in a meeting, unless the door is open or there are large windows — for there have been many cases of slander of this kind, and many accusations, great cases of accusation. A man must be very careful in that, and the wisdom of it is plain.

The sixth: having a strong ʿaqīdah, having strong īmān. That too keeps a man away — first, it allows him to survive, and it keeps him from what is unlawful and wrong. Yūsuf (peace be upon him) is very strong. It is said of Yūsuf (peace be upon him): wa hammat bihi wa hamma bihā.

There is also the account of a man who had moved to another country and was about to visit a woman for something unlawful; and as he knocked at the door he felt a slap — he felt a sting. So Allah does save people in various ways. But we cannot rely upon that: we must ask Allah to save us, and in shāʾ Allāh Allah will save us. It shows nonetheless the fortification of a man's faith, the fortitude of his faith. The seventh…