The Wife Who Denied the Blessing, and What Shaytan Learned From It

When the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) went on the Miʿrāj, he was shown Jannah and Jahannam, and he noticed a large number of women in Jahannam. To his surprise, he asked: "Yā Jibrīl, what is the meaning of this — why are there so many women in Jahannam?" The explanation given to him is that a man in charge of looking after a family — the wife and the children — providing for them, food, clothing, shelter, protection, for years, thirty or forty years, constantly does this; and one day, for some reason, he gets into an argument with his wife, and the wife says: "What did I ever see from you in the last forty years anyway?" What has she just done? She has denied the great niʿmah, the gift that Allah (swt) sent to her, through the agency of her husband, for so many years — in one sentence declaring that she saw nothing good from him for forty years, nothing.

She thought she was merely having an argument with her husband, trying to hurt his feelings; but in fact she was denying the niʿmah, covering it up, rejecting it, refusing to acknowledge it, ungrateful to the blessing and favour Allah (swt) had sent her for so many years through her husband.

When shayṭān — upon him be the curse — learned the value of shukr, what it does for a muʾmin, a believer, a Muslim, and understood that it is one of the most exalted and highest states, a maqām, that a servant of Allah (swt) can achieve — the maqām of shukr, the maqām of the shākirīn — he directed all his efforts toward distancing people from this particular quality. As Allah (swt) explains to us in the Qurʾān, quoting him:

A remarkable diagnosis from shayṭān himself. He said: "Then, O Lord of the worlds, I will approach them from in front of them, to deceive them, to deviate them; from behind them, to deceive them, to deviate them from the straight path; and from their right and from their left, I will do the same — and You will find that most of them are altogether unaware, and most of them are ungrateful to You." He was referring to the majority of human beings, who fall easy prey to shayṭān.

Once people are ungrateful — meaning they do not recognise the Giver, Allah (swt) — shayṭān has easy access to them: very easy to deceive, very easy to cheat. But Allah (swt) described the grateful among His servants, the shākirīn, as being very few in number:

Work, O family of Dāwūd, in thankfulness — and few of My servants are the thankful. By nature, by design, when a person is hard pressed with a difficulty, he immediately, in desperation, turns to Allah (swt): Yā Rabbī, please help. This recognition of Allah (swt) comes at once — if there is a serious illness among one's children, or something else pressing in life, the hands go up in prayer. Even the most ardent atheist, the most hardcore atheist, when he is truly pushed, will be found making duʿāʾ and asking for forgiveness and asking to believe in Allah (swt).